Wednesday, September 16, 2009

The next chapter...

I dropped Little M off at preschool today for the first time. The whole time commitment thing is not that huge - one morning a week - but the realization of this milestone is poignant all the same!

I literally changed her clothes three times before we were out the door.

Not that I'm mentally revisiting my childhood school days or anything like that :)!

I was more nervous than she was. She didn't skip a beat. No lengthy, teary good byes. Just a sticker with her name, a wave and a smile. Not really knowing any of the other kids, she grabbed a chair, and in her own quiet way, started to play.

I admire her courage. Just this Monday, I had a square peg-round hole kinda day. It started off with Little M yelling "GET OUT OF BEEEED." I groaned as I cracked my eyes open. (You'd think I'm never out of bed before the kids!!) It didn't take long before the flurry of insecurities and anxieties made their presence known. Groan. And it only got better from there :). After a meltdown in the local grocer parking lot, Little M yelled all the way home. Which would've been - "fine"- if we were in the van. But we weren't! Oh NOOOOO. Anyone standing outside their house that fine morning would've heard the shouted protests and arguments coming from the bike buggy. There was a little girl in there and she. was. MAD!! Smiling in spite of this, I actually did take the long road home. The sun felt glorious, it was breezy enough to keep the bugs at bay, and well, if they're gonna holler, lettem holler :P.

When I was younger, I couldn't wait to be older. I think, in most part, because I believed that when you got older, you outgrew your insecurities like you outgrew your school clothes :). Now that I'm "all grown up" :P, I realize that it's more like your insecurities become that comfy old sweater that you pull outta the closet every so often and just wear around for a while. :)

While these kinds of days are not as much fun, I'm realizing they are crucial in helping me grow into the person I hope to become, bringing with them the gifts of insight and challenge.

As I watch my little one embrace these milestones, I am inspired by her courage and her adaptability. She's a gem (hollering and all!!!).

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